Monday, November 14, 2016

Moderation, Not Deprivation...


There it was, staring me in the face, in black and white…..my TRUE weight!  Surely the scales HAD to be wrong! (No, those are not my legs...I wish they were)



The last time I weighed this much I gave birth to something.  This time, unfortunately, I didn’t have anything waiting to be born.  With a disgusting sigh, I stepped off the scales and weighed (…ha…get it…) :-) my options.

The way I saw it, I had two choices….I could maintain my current miserable weight or I could get busy and do something about it.  And let me tell you, this was hard for me as I've never had a weight problem.  Stupid menopause!!

Since the hubster was battling his own weight issues and some borderline high blood pressure problems, we set out on our weight loss venture.

The first decision we made is that we would not diet...we would not deprive ourselves of the foods we enjoyed...we would be moderate with our intake of them.  We developed a healthy routine of eating and exercise that would work for us.  We wanted this change to be permanent, not temporary.  We turned to technology (the last place one would think about looking) for answers, downloaded a few fitness and calorie counting apps, researched some food plans and began our journey.

As of today, I've lost 15 pounds and the hubster has lost 20.  He dropped his in 4 weeks, while it has taken me 3 months (don't you hate that men can lose weight so much more easily?).  I went from a 4 Mt. Dew-a-day habit to rarely drinking caffeine.  And believe me, leaving those Mt. Dews behind has been difficult.  Now, I drink anywhere between 1 ½ to 2 gallons of water a day.

By using MyFitnessPal and FitBit, we have learned to be aware of exactly what we are eating.  Everything we eat gets recorded, including vitamins...they have calories.  The hubster laughs and says that he doesn't really have to worry about his calories since I can recite the calories, sugars, carbs, fat and protein content of just about everything we eat.



We both exercise.  I exercise 5-6 days a week...some cardio, some strength training/toning.  I do it all from home.  I didn't want to go to the gym while I was overweight, so I thought I would lose all of the weight I wanted and then try the gym.  We have eliminated a lot of processed foods, eating more protein, fruits and veggies..I eat more fruits, the hubster eats more veggies...we balance it out.  We still go out to eat, we just make better choices.

We still eat our favorite foods...pasta, bread, rice, nachos, cake, chocolate, tacos, etc. we just eat it in moderation.  I still plan on having egg nog during the holidays....I just won't have 3 glasses before bedtime! :-)  When we went to the State Fair this year, we split a fried snickers and I had a foot long corny dog...after all, you cannot go to the fair and not have a corny dog!

Our rule is and will be moderation, not deprivation.  We feel that most diets fail because one has to deprive themselves of something they enjoy.  So far, our plan is working for us.  Each person has to find what works for them.   And the best part of this weight loss journey....besides the weight loss....I get to have a chocolate or vanilla milkshake EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  I will share that recipe in my next post!  But for now, a little something for your viewing pleasure...




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34 comments

  1. Way to go, Benita. I have been very fortunate not to ever have had a weight problem, but I suspect a very large part of that is the amount of water I have always drunk, no alcohol, and I rarely eat in the evening. I have watched family members struggle, and I know the struggle is real. I try never to body shame anyone because, as a dancer, I've seen the flipside of overweight (anorexia) in young girls, and it is, unfortunately, promoted universally in subliminal ways (not just in the dance world). The main point is to have a goal of being healthy, and you guys sound like you're killing it!

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    1. Thank you so much! Until menopause, I never had one either. I had always been small. It has just slowly been creeping up and while it hasn't been that much, it has bothered me and I didn't like feeling blech all the time. Our goal is to be healthy and active and stay on top of what we eat! Thank you again for your encouragement! Love and hugs!

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  2. Makes sense to do it with less food and more exercise. I cheer you on.

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    1. That seems to be the perfect ratio...but still getting enough carbs, proteins and fat to supplement the weight loss. It's a crazy cycle...you have to eat fat to lose fat...LOL Thanks so much! Love and hugs!

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  3. This really is just the best way! Thanks for the positive attitude and little push. :)

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    1. Thank you and you are welcome! The MyFitnessPal app really does help keep things under control and in perspective. Love and hugs!!

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  4. Good for you! (Both of you!) Sounds like a very healthy path you are walking... I keep telling myself, "eat less, move more". Somewhere along the way the words got scrambled...ha! Have a splendid day...xoxo

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    1. Thank you so much Donna! We took our cue from one of the commercials we've seen..."a body in motion stays in motion...a body at rest stays at rest". We just want to develop good habits that will stick with us and keep us from gaining weight again. Aging is a force to be reckoned with...LOL. Have a great day! Love and hugs!!

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  5. You go girl!!!! Yep you have to find something that will work for you that you can keep going with.
    I found that having a protein shake in the am and yogurt helps me to stay full longer through the day.
    I still eat what I love but in moderation too. I think you are so right eating less and moving more is the key especially after menopause.
    Hugs,
    Kris

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    1. Kris, thank you so much! Everyone's body and metabolism is different, I think that is why some of the diets just don't work. I usually have a protein shake for breakfast (after my workout), along with low sodium turkey bacon and sometimes a boiled egg and dry toast. Sometimes I eat low fat whole wheat Eggo waffles. Just depends on how hungry I am after that workout...LOL. Eating a larger breakfast does keep me full until lunch and reduces the chances of snacking. If I snack, it is usually some fruit...occasionally a piece of chocolate. Moderation and movement is definitely the thing though. Love and hugs to you!

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  6. Good for you, Benita! It's very annoying that weight comes off of men more easily, but you are doing it right. You'll be at your goal in no time. Funny dancing babies always make me smile. ;)
    Have a great day! xo, T.

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    1. Thank you so much!! I loved those dancing babies when I saw them…knew they would fit on the blog. And believe me, those babies are waaayyyyy cuter than the guys in the original video…LOL. It is truly annoying…they really don’t even have to try!! Hope you have a great one also..love and hugs to you!

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  7. Great for both of you! I won't deprive myself. But then I've never binged on anything. I just don't think I care about food enough to bother! I would "drink" all my meals if I could in a shake or something, because meals just aren't very important to me. I was taking blood pressure meds in my thirties, and I was not overweight. So I guess it's genetic. I love milk shakes!
    Brenda

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    1. Thank you so much Brenda! That was our first rule...no deprivation...I just don't think it works well. I'm not a huge eater either, so it is difficult for me to reach my calorie intake sometimes. But I know in order to lose, I have to at least have a minimum of 1,000 calories a day. MyFitnessPal says I need 1200 to meet my target weight. I think a lot of people are just genetically predisposed to high blood pressure, which I think is the hubster's case since both of his parents have it. But he wants to try every avenue before he resorts to meds. I love milkshakes also and this one is great because it can also be used as a meal replacement! :-) Love and hugs!!

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  8. It sounds like you and the hubby are being really smart about this, Benita. Congrats on your successes! I'm curious about whether you have noticed anything with your skin by giving up the "yellow poison" (haha, one of my favorite beverages) and are drinking so much water. I need to change my ways! I keep thinking that if it would improve my skin to drink water, that might motivate me. Although, so far the only change I've made is to replace Mt Dew with Starbucks lattes, so there's that ;)

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    1. Thank you so much Julie!! We have been pleased with the progress. And you are too funny about the Mt. Dew to Starbucks…that would be a transition I would make also if I liked coffee…LOL

      I haven’t noticed any change with my skin. Menopause just really socked me with skin, hair and weight issues. My skin is still dry as a desert even though I drink so much water. It goes through periods of trying to be normal, but then defaults right back to itchy and dry. I hate it. When we go out to eat or something, my natural instinct is to order a Mt. Dew or Coke, so I have to catch myself and order water. I still have about 12 cans in the refrigerator…for just in case I have a breakdown…LOL. I do have a drink of one, rarely though, for when I’m just craving them like crazy. Seems the 1 or 2 swallows satisfies me. Now, when we were in Colorado a few weeks ago and went up to Pike’s Peak, I drank an entire bottle because I was so sick. For some reason, Mt. Dew is the only thing that settles my stomach when I’m nauseated. It tasted awful because it was so sweet, but did the trick. Love and hugs!!

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    2. Well, shoot! Menopause, stress, and genetics have done a number on me, too. Sagging skin, osteoporosis, and poorly-distributed weight leave me only 2 options then...cosmetic surgery (which I don't want to pay for or recover from) or just live with it. Ugh, hahaha. At least we're all in this together, right Ladies? :)

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    3. Menopause is a killer of all good things. The cosmetic surgery isn’t an option for me either…and everything just shifts back to its original spot eventually anyway. That’s why I’ve chosen to fight it all I can….it wins most rounds, but I’m not giving up yet…LOL And yes, we definitely are all in it together…no one escapes! LOL

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  9. I think its great that your hubby is on board with you, Benita. Having a partner really helps. My husband and I used to go to the gym together and he was very consistent so that motivated me not to slack off. I agree with you that menopause is a monster when it comes to weight gain. I was always 115 lbs. soaking wet. I have grown another Jane! Food isn't my problem, getting enough exercise is. Wondering what you do from home to get that in...

    I have the app and a FitBit. Now I need to use them!

    Jane

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    1. Thank you so much! I think it helps also and he really wanted to lose a few pounds and get in better shape. It's good that he's doing it with me or else he would be hungry most of the time...LOL You are too funny....another Jane...LOL. Honey, I know what you mean...I stayed around 100 - 105 until menopause, then it all changed. I grew hips and lumps in places I never knew existed! The reason food became a problem for me was not the quantity of what I ate, it was the quality of what I ate. I could eat nachos every day for lunch...and Whataburger and Milos and Sneaky Pete's hot dogs, etc.....those things, paired with the Mt. Dews are enough calories to kill a camel...heck, the Mt. Dews alone are.

      I started slow with the exercise using my exercise apps and MyFitnessPal. I exercise every morning..sometimes 30 minutes, sometimes 1 hour, sometimes 2 hours, depending on what I feel like. We also get up and move around during TV time..do some squats or jumping jacks or just walk around the house a few times...it all gets your metabolism going and you will notice a difference in how you feel. I also found a gummie vitamin for women (I'm a big baby when it comes to swallowing pills) that boosts metabolism and provides bone health. I don't intake the right amount of nutrients so the vitamins help me out. We also have a cheat day once a week, usually on Sundays. We don't exercise and we eat what we've been craving during the week. Surprisingly though, we still stay within our calorie limits and we find that the things that used to taste good (fast food) don't anymore. Way more information than you wanted, but hopefully something that will help. Love and hugs!! :-)

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  10. Good for you, Benita!! I am following Weight Watchers online, which works for me. It pretty much supports the same thing - no deprivation, just moderation!

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    1. Thank you and good for you too!! When we started our thinking was that we all have to do what works for us. The hubster and I have totally different workout plans and food needs. We eat similar items, he just eats alot more because he needs more. I feel that depriving yourself of something encourages you to quit and go back to old habits. If you can eat what you want and attain your goals, then that's what works! Love and hugs!!

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  11. That's awesome!! I have never had a weight problem either, but middle age is not kind and I seem to need to watch what I eat now. How fun. Probably for the best, I wasn't really the healthiest eater before...but bring on the milkshakes!

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    1. Thank you so much! I never had a problem until menopause. And you are so right, middle age is not kind and it doesn’t get better. My normal weight before menopause was around 100 to 105 and I could eat whatever. I wasn’t and am still not the healthiest eater, but I’m better than I was. The milkshakes make my day…LOL The other good thing is that I have more energy and feel so much better…not as sluggish. Love and hugs!!

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  12. So proud of you and the hubster! I actually saw eggnog at the grocery store today and thought of you!!! I almost got it but resisted until closer to Christmas. Great plan to eat in moderation instead of deprivation. It should be your new lifestyle in order to maintain it.

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    1. Thank you so much! We've been working hard. I have 3 cartons of eggnog in the refrigerator...LOL We will have some all during the holidays, but definitely in moderation! Moderation is working for us and we are going to stick to it! Love and hugs!!

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  13. First ... HA HA .. that video!

    Yay!! Yippee!! I love what you wrote regarding weight loss. I agree 100% about depriving yourself. You are so right, it makes no sense to do that.
    Thank you for writing about this and I am looking forward to the new recipe on the way for the milkshake. :-)

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    1. Aren't those babies adorable??!! LOL You are so welcome and thank you for the encouragement. There are days I'm done with exercising, but I keep thinking about the progress and forge ahead...LOL Love and hugs to you! PS...the milkshake is truly wonderful!! :-)

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  14. Way to go on the 15 pounds weight loss. I totally agree that it is all about portion size. I am not a big fan of exercising but I do it anyway mainly in the form of walking and weight lifting all at home. Why can't veggies taste like cookies Ha! looking forward to you milkshake recipe. Enjoy your evening. Hugs!

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    1. Thanks so much!! We do all of our exercising at home also...just seems to run a little smoother and I don't feel the time crunch that I think I would feel if I had to go to the gym every day. I'm with you, if veggies tasted like cookies, we would all be healthy! LOL..Love and hugs to you! Have a great weekend!

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  15. Like you, I was a hottie until menopause, then lo and behold, I started carrying around the equivalent of a small trailer. Ok, maybe not quite, but how about more than 40 lbs more than when I got married? Sad but true.

    I don't believe in diets for long term success, but when our daughter got married I dropped a little more than 15 lbs with WW, but I kind of knew I'd gain it back. Unlike you, my problem isn't quality, it's quantity. I could eat a rhinosorous as a midnight snack and not blink an eye. :/

    xxx

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    1. LOL…you crack me up!!! But I do know the feeling. I’m short and anything I gain is like carrying around a small trailer…LOL I have gained 23 pounds in the last 8 ½ years, which truly isn’t a tremendous amount, but enough to make me absolutely miserable and disgusted with myself. I don’t believe in dieting either and feel that they never really work because they are hard to stick with and it’s hard to keep the rebounding at bay. That’s why we chose to just watch what we eat and how much of it. Now, on those days where I eat an entire bag of Hershey’s kisses, I know that I can’t have the loaf of French bread at dinner….see, it’s all about choices…LOL Love and hugs!!

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  16. My darling girl, I am shocked that you went on a diet, that you needed to--I went to lunch with you and heavens to Betsy you were a tiny little thing! But it does sound like a lot of what you're doing is simply living more healthily and that's got to be a good thing for anyone, no matter their size.

    So I'm very proud of you. And having just read your current post about the LBD, I'm sure you would look smashing in any of them. Just have lots of fun wearing it!

    Dewena

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    1. Thank you so much Dewena...you are so sweet!! We definitely just wanted to be more healthy and I wasn't comfortable with my weight. I've always been small and over the years, weight just kept creeping up on me. When we met, I was about 25 pounds heavier than my normal weight. I've lost 20 so far and just want to maintain that. We really needed to change some of our eating habits. We still eat alot of the same things, just make better choices about them. One thing we've have to eliminate this holiday season is eggnog. Not completely, but not drinking a carton a day...LOL. It's killing me! Love you sweet lady!!

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